Becca Benz exclusive interview with: Becca Benz!

Hello Becca, and thank you for agreeing to do this interview!

Thank you Becca, I’m a big fan of your writing and it’s an honor to be interviewed by you!

Okay, seriously. I’ve been thinking about doing a question and answer column for a while now and I thought this would be fun to do. These are questions I routinely get asked, so I figured I’d answer them in a unique way like this! I hope you enjoy it.

Are you single?

Yes, I am currently single. I haven’t been in a relationship since before I transitioned, which is something that has been painful and discouraging at times. Part of it was that I gave up on dating and lost hope of ever finding anyone, and part of it was that I tried too hard at times. Dating is hard enough at my age but then you throw in being trans and it makes it even more complicated. But I decided a couple of years ago to give it another try, so I’ve been more social and putting myself out there in hopes of meeting someone. I met someone late last year and we saw each other for a while, and even though it didn’t work out it gave me renewed confidence that I could date and gave me hope. People tell me I’m so nice and pretty, and that they’re surprised I’m single, but I feel like I’m the person that is always “the friend” and never the one people want a relationship with. I’ll keep trying, and I figure if it’s meant to happen then it will.

Are you more attracted to men or women?

I used to intentionally be vague when answering this because I assumed if I told people the truth it might be bad for business, but I’ve been more open about it lately. I’ve always been attracted to women, especially feminine women. Men never interested in. However, a funny thing has happened over the past two years; I’ve become more open and realized that I’m attracted to people based on who they are as a person and that it was ridiculous to limit myself based on what was between their legs. Part of my reluctance to be with men was because I was more comfortable with women; I had a lot more experience with vaginas than penises. I know I can give pleasure to someone with a vagina, but I had very little experience with penises (aside from my own) and I was insecure about whether or not I could give pleasure to someone with a penis. But now I’m not so stressed about it because I know I do okay with penises too. So I now consider myself pansexual. Having said that, I still prefer feminine women, whether they be trans or cis, but there have been certain men I’ve been attracted to as well. And it’s been my experience that women tend to be better lovers, or at least the type of lover I prefer: lots of snuggling and kissing and touching and taking our time.

Do you prefer to top or bottom?

My usual response to this is that it just depends on the person, which is true, but I do not like to bottom because it hurts. Maybe I haven’t learned how to do it the right way or I’m doing something wrong, but bottoming is not the least bit pleasurable for me.

Do you consider yourself a pornstar?

I always get uncomfortable when people call me a pornstar because I’ve done a total of two shoots, both solos, so I feel like I haven’t shot enough porn to be considered a pornstar. To me pornstars are people like Miran, Kylie Maria, and Mia Maffia; people who regularly produce content that’s posted on sites and who also have a certain star charisma. I’m very flattered some people consider me a pornstar, but I just don’t feel I’m deserving of that title. I’d like to think I’m more of a goodwill ambassador for the trans porn industry.

Why don’t you post nude pictures of yourself on social media?

It’s a personal choice. Yes I’ve done porn shoots but I don’t feel the need to post a bunch of nude pictures of myself; it’s just not who I am. I’m more of a sensual person and I prefer pictures which leave a little to the imagination. And as a photographer myself and someone who can be a bit of a perfectionist, I find blatant nudity is generally not to my liking artistically or creatively; I much prefer to be more sensual and seductive, wearing a bit of clothing or to be posing in a way that doesn’t show everything.

Will you do anymore shoots?

After doing my initial shoot with Grooby in September of 2014 I had a set of goals which I wanted to accomplish and a long-term plan that I was focused on. I chose not to pursue anymore porn shoots because I wanted to see how things in my life unfolded. I did some other shoots such as bikini and soft-core stuff because that’s what I really enjoy and it just worked out that I had the opportunities to do those. I would be open to doing another porn shoot and have inquired about it, but at this point it’s out of my hands. I have had offers to do shoots with other models, which I have turned down. I feel a great deal of loyalty to Grooby because Steven gave me my first opportunity and I consider the people who work at Grooby to be friends, so if I do another shoot I want it to be for Grooby. That might not be the wisest business decision, but I’m old-school and loyalty means a lot to me.

Do you consider yourself a role model?

I used to be I’m uncomfortable with this one too, but I have come to realize that some people do consider me a role model, which is something that means a great deal to me and that I take very seriously. I try to do the right things and be a good example in how I live my life and how I treat others. I am very humbled and flattered that people look up to me for whatever reason and that I have the opportunity to inspire and help people in my own little way. That is what gives my life meaning; being able to help others and contribute something positive to the world.

How come you haven’t been on social as much the past couple of weeks?

Several reasons. I’ve been dealing with depression over the past few months and I tend to withdraw when I’m depressed. I’ve also had a lot of personal issues going on in my life lately which have required my attention and have been emotionally draining and not left me as much time to be online. And lastly, I made a simple comment on Twitter a few weeks ago which was twisted around by some people and I received a lot of flak and hurtful comments because of it, so I took a break from social media after that. I realize you need a thick skin when it comes to social media and I can deal with most things, but what happened was very personal to me and it hurt me a lot. I am back now but there remains a level of distrust and I am a lot more careful about what I say.

Can I be your slave?

You’d be surprised at how many offers I get from guys who want to be my personal slave. Seriously. I do have a kinky side and if I’m out playing I might enjoy having a slave at that particular moment, and would definitely love to be a slave, but when it comes to me everyday life I have no need for a slave. I do appreciate all the offers, but I’m not looking for a full-time slave at the moment.

How do you feel about dick pictures?

Anyone who knows me at all knows I hate dick pictures. If I get a dick picture sent to me on Facebook that person will automatically get blocked. To me it’s extremely rude and pretentious to assume that I want to see a picture of your penis. Rest assured, I don’t. And if you think I’m going to be impressed, you could not be more wrong. Anyone who has the mentality to think that sending me a dick picture is a good idea is someone I have no desire to get to know. If you want to impress me then engage me in an intelligent conversation.

Can I Skype with you or call you on Facebook video chat?

I’m a fairly private person so I rarely give out my phone number unless we know each other pretty well. As for Skyping and video-chatting on Facebook, I’m not a big fan of it. I have major insecurities about how my voice sounds, so unless you are family or a close friend I prefer to not talk on the phone or video-chat. It’s not that I don’t enjoy chatting, because I do, very much, but my insecurities about my voice over-ride my desire to chat. I’m much more comfortable meeting in person than talking on the phone or video-chatting because it helps me feel more at ease when I can read body language and see other visual cues which I can’t do on the phone.

Can we see more pictures of your feet?

This is another thing which was totally unexpected. I always thought my feet were kind of ugly, but apparently I was wrong. People seem to love my feet. Lots of people! I think part of it might be because my nails are always meticulously polished, but who knows. Back to the question, yes, I will be posting more pictures of my feet. It’s hard to get a decent angle when taking feet pictures myself, but I’ll do my best. I had a shoot scheduled in Los Angeles specifically for my feet, but that got put on hold when I moved back to Portland.

Will you be moving back to Los Angeles?

I will be back in Los Angeles for a couple of weeks in August, but beyond that I’m not sure. There are a lot more opportunities for me in Los Angeles, both professionally and personally, and I miss my friends there. I had a wonderful life in Los Angeles from which I was abruptly uprooted, and I miss that life a lot. But having my son and grandson here in Portland has given me a chance to spend a lot of time with them, which has been a joy, and the decision to leave them would be really, really difficult. So right now I’m not sure what will happen and there are a lot of difficult decisions to be made.

What happened that made you leave Los Angeles?

I was working for Venus Lux when my employment was abruptly terminated and I was given 72 hours to pack up and leave. There is a lot more I could say about what happened but for now I will continue to remain silent. But I will have my say when the time is right.

“How come there are times you put certain drama on Facebook? Not to judge or tell you what to do, if you feel posting it out will make you feel better.”

Someone I considered a friend asked me this, and I while I do see what they were getting at, I admit it kind of irritated me. Yes, I post a lot of personal things, for several reasons. When I got on social media I made the decision to be pretty open about what I share. I wanted to present an accurate picture of who I was, and only posting about the good stuff would not be accurate. So I post about both the good and the bad stuff going on in my life. I don’t post about every little thing and I try to be mindful about not going overboard about the bad stuff, but looking back there have been things which I wish I hadn’t posted, but such is life. Also, I’m a social person and I have always written a lot, so it’s natural that translates to social media; I’m big on communicating. But the main reason I share so much, and the reason which is most important to me, is that I have a lot of friends on social media who I consider important and treasured people in my life and I value their input and support. I learned a long time ago that I can’t get through life trying to deal with everything by myself, that I need the support of my friends and family, hence I post a lot on social media. I am not into drama and don’t ever post anything just because I want attention; I post about what’s going on in my life or things which are important to me or relevant in some way.

How can I become a model?

This is something I get asked a lot. First off, let me say you don’t have to be 22 and have a perfect body in order to be a successful model. Grooby is known for shooting models of all shapes and sizes and ages, so don’t dwell on the physical stuff. What is most important is self-confidence. You can be beautiful and have a killer body but if the confidence is not there then it’s going to show. The other important thing is to make sure you’re at a point in your life where you’re comfortable with yourself and you have no reservations about getting into adult entertainment. If you have any doubts then that’s a good indication you aren’t ready. And if you get rejected the first time you apply it’s not the end of the world. Take Steven’s advice and work on whatever he suggests, and then reapply. Below are links to Steven’s blog where he discusses the process of how to apply to be a model and a couple of other modeling related blog posts:

How to Apply to be a TG Model for Grooby – 2015

Being a TG Model in 2015. Working For Grooby & Other Options

Tgirl Models : Only Debut in a Solo Shoot & Do Hardcore With the Right Companies.

So You Want To Be a Male Performer (Revised Nov 2014)

What is your life really like?

Well, to be honest, my life is actually pretty boring lol I’m kind of a homebody and spend a lot of time working on writing projects, reading, or watching Cardinals games. I’ve gotten back into cooking and have enjoyed playing with new recipes and seeing what I can create. I generally just wear sweats or shorts around the house and don’t wear makeup too often these days, so I look a bit frumpy at when I’m home. But I do enjoy dressing in something slinky and sexy and going out to clubs, although I haven’t gone out much since moving back to Portland. I’ve spent a lot of time with my son and grandson, which has been wonderful. My clothes usually end up covered in spit-up and drool, but I that’s a small price to pay in exchange for all the smiles and giggles and precious moments I get to spend with him. I could easily see myself settling down and just being a grandma, but there is still a part of me that enjoys the night life of Los Angeles and all the clubs and parties, so the future remains uncertain at this point.

So there you go! I hope you enjoyed reading this and I encourage you to send me any questions you have so we can have another question and answer column! Thanks for reading!