Are “you guys” being overly sensitive?

We in the transgender community have a lot of things to be concerned about in these troubling times. Our state and federal governments continue to attempt passage of legislation which takes away our rights and makes it legal to discriminate against us. Bathroom bills continue to be proposed in state after state. Federal protections for transgender youth have been done away with, leaving them more vulnerable and at even greater risk of bullying. Transgender murders and suicides continue at a horrendous rate. Trans people still have high rates of unemployment and poverty. We have a president who is systematically taking away our rights, such as declaring he will reinstate the ban on trans people serving openly in the military, and who is sorely lacking in moral character by failing to stand up to and condemn the violence and hate carried out by the white supremacists and neo-Nazis. We have a nation which is divided and coming apart at the seams.

And in the midst of all these pressing issues, there are an increasingly large number of people in our community who would rather worry about petty things, which, in the large scheme of things, aren’t really very relevant. And more importantly, they divert our time and attention away from the issues which are important. One of my pet peeves is people who get very offended when they are part of a mix-gender group of people which gets referred to as “you guys.” I completely understand that some people are sensitive to being triggered by certain things, such as being mis-gendered. No one, including me, likes to be mis-gendered, and especially when it’s intentional and meant to be hurtful. But the term “you guys” is generally considered to be gender-neutral. There is a big difference between being called a guy, which is gender specific, and being among a group of people which is addressed as “you guys.” We need to use common sense and have some level of comprehension as to how the comment was said and the intended meaning. Someone can be called a lady, but based on the context of how it was said along with the tone of voice and whether it was said sarcastically, it can be said as an insult and to be demeaning.

Some words, such as dude, guy, lady, gal, girl, boy, etc., refer to specific genders and are pretty much universally accepted. “You guys” is generally accepted as a generic mixed-gender colloquialism. Very few people these days refer to a mixed gender group as “guys and gals.” Just doesn’t happen in today’s society and with how the English language has evolved. Should we be in an uproar because we still continue to use the words “manhole cover,” “freshman,” and “mankind?” Again, where do we draw the line? Should we start a petition to change the name to “womanhole covers?” I personally think that sounds like a bad idea!

My point, is that sometimes we lose perspective, and maybe get a bit overly sensitive. Let’s not jump down someone’s throat over an innocent comment when there was no malice or ill-intent behind it. The English language is always evolving and words take on new meanings, but we still have to use common sense and take into account the context of how something was said, along with body language and tone of voice. Let’s not stress over the little things when we have so many important issues which need our attention.

And with that I’m going to thank you guys for taking the time to read this and go to bed now!